Last year, I hosted a Twitter music forum via Musochat dedicated to commissioning and collaboration etiquette and netiquette. While I and the participants mentioned several good key points to consider when working with commissioners or musicians, I neglected to mention another related situation: specifically, one that people must avoid at all costs if they want to be perceived as the professionals that they are (or should be). I am talking, of course, about "ghosting." It is that one social media tactic guaranteed to enrage people both online and in reality.
What exactly is ghosting? Let me put it this way. Imagine if you had been conversing with someone online for one or several days, and that person suddenly disappeared. They just stopped talking to you, left and deleted their profile for what seemed like no reason at all. Then, when you tried to reconnect with that person who disappeared, you got blocked. That is ghosting. It often demonstrates severe immaturity, because it means that the person with whom you are are communicating (or trying to) refuses to act like an adult. Ghosting is commonly encountered in situations involving online dating and social media and is completely unacceptable in workplace environments.
What does ghosting have to do with commissioning new music and collaborations. Plenty, actually. In the forum last year, I posed the question of composers or commissioners should do if the person with whom they are collaborating has not responded to their messages or updates in over one week. To summarize, I mentioned that people need to send a gentle reminder instead of angry responses and publicly telling everyone online what a jerk the person is. Ghosting falls along these same lime. Like Internet "flame" messages, ghosting your commissioner of collaborator (or vice versa) also comes off as unprofessional and immature. Remember that there are better, more tactful ways of declining projects than randomly leaving and deleting your contact information. If a currently commissioned piece or project is not working, then the composer and commissioner or collaborator need to work together and explain why the music does not work. More importantly, they need to create a solution to prevent future problems.
What exactly is ghosting? Let me put it this way. Imagine if you had been conversing with someone online for one or several days, and that person suddenly disappeared. They just stopped talking to you, left and deleted their profile for what seemed like no reason at all. Then, when you tried to reconnect with that person who disappeared, you got blocked. That is ghosting. It often demonstrates severe immaturity, because it means that the person with whom you are are communicating (or trying to) refuses to act like an adult. Ghosting is commonly encountered in situations involving online dating and social media and is completely unacceptable in workplace environments.
What does ghosting have to do with commissioning new music and collaborations. Plenty, actually. In the forum last year, I posed the question of composers or commissioners should do if the person with whom they are collaborating has not responded to their messages or updates in over one week. To summarize, I mentioned that people need to send a gentle reminder instead of angry responses and publicly telling everyone online what a jerk the person is. Ghosting falls along these same lime. Like Internet "flame" messages, ghosting your commissioner of collaborator (or vice versa) also comes off as unprofessional and immature. Remember that there are better, more tactful ways of declining projects than randomly leaving and deleting your contact information. If a currently commissioned piece or project is not working, then the composer and commissioner or collaborator need to work together and explain why the music does not work. More importantly, they need to create a solution to prevent future problems.
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